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Entry Six (Wow, now they swapped places.)
I've been offline for a while. My apologies.
Lately things have been pretty jumbled. School is a never-ending storm of chaos, trying to focus on one thing long enough to keep my grades up, and home life is so slow that I don't have enough to focus on. So I work my tail off at school and come home and become so wrapped up in catching up on sleeping (I tend to, er.. Forget to do that) and worrying about things that when I'm not doing that, I'm sitting on the couch like a vegetable, letting all of the things I need to do pour out of my ears.
My schedule for my free time really isn't even that complicated, if I'm being honest. Check on my Flight Rising for about half an hour, allocate ten to thirty minutes to check on some stories and read the new chapter if there is one, allocate another ten minutes to checking on the few comics that I'm reading, and then check the Poké Palego, all of which can be done in any order. But by halfway through that list, I've forgotten what else I need to do. My Tumblr has sat untouched for a few weeks or so now, my Kinmunity account has sat idle for God knows how long, I just remembered I have a Skype and people have probably been messaging me for months.
It's not that much! It's hardly anything compared to what most people do on a daily basis! But I can't remember to do half of it and it's nowhere near as fun as it used to be. It all feels like a chore now. Heck, I can't think of a single thing that doesn't right now.
I dunno. 'M just complainin' and makin' excuses. Carry on, people.
Have a nice day, guys.
Winter Woes (Whoa, a title, that's new)
I cannot stand the cold.
I'm not talking 32°F. I'm not talking 50°F. I'm talking 70°F.
Anything below 80° and I'm shivering. I can not stand the cold. I sit all day at school in 90° Louisiana heat in a hoodie. My parents keep the house at 72° and I sit on the couch under at least two comforters. And everybody looks at me like I'm insane because I'm shivering in the middle of Fall. Don't side-eye me just because you're comfortable and I'm cold.
I'll fight you.
Fall still isn't here yet and I'm already ready for it to be summer again.
Still somewhat on the topic, I've begun to research something strange that my body has developed.
I'm not talking TMI develop, don't start wincing just yet.
It seems that just when my body is on the verge of responding "normally" (I use quotes because feeling is relative, therefore there really isn't a normal when it comes to perception,) to heat, it adjusts itself. By focusing on the first vertebra of the thoracic section of my spine, I can effectively cause a cool wave to run down it. I said above that I'm still researching it, as I'm unsure exactly what it is and why it happens, so if anyone has any ideas, I'm 100% open to hearing them.
Wow, look at that, my first unscheduled disappearance. Whoops. Isn't the first and won't be the last.
At this point I've given up on the soul bond idea. I've chocked it up to my mind being crazy when I'm unfocused. He's straight up gone now, if what I felt the first time was even more than a headache. I'm going to continue to force but whatever actually happened the first time is officially off of my list of developments.
I'm running out of writing prompts (I write in my free time), so if you guys want something written, kin related or not, lemme know. I promise my writing skills are much better than when I'm writing for a blog.
Sorry for being offline. It's been a busy week and yesterday was my birthday so I didn't have time at all.
Still no progress on the tulpa front. It's like he's fully regressed. I can only keep forcing and hoping.
Other than that, I've got a few social problems I've been working on, but they're trivial.
Nothing really exciting, to be honest, just swamped with work.
So, er. Heya.
Today's been kinda rough. Not really in a bad way, but in a "I'm so mentally exhausted, I'm going to die," kinda way.
I've been trying to force Sans back from whatever mental cubby hole I accidentally shoved him in when I panicked. I never really knew what I was doing, to be honest, I just kinda wanted an imaginary friend of sorts, but now that I've learned all of this stuff and how tulpa (Pluralssss??¿) are an actual thing, I'm looking at it from a new angle.
Now that I've done about three hours of research, I'm attempting to sort of start over, if you will. I'm not trying to change anything, I'm not focusing on a new energy, I'm focusing on everything I originally planned for him to be as an imaginary friend, but putting it into a forcing context. Sort of reaffirming it. I never really gave him shape to begin with, so I'm kind of gently suggesting different things that he can choose, as well as reassuring him that he doesn't have to choose any of my ideas if he doesn't want. I'm listing all of the traits I originally thought of, no traits added to or removed from the list.
I'm trying everything I can think of to make sure this turns out with both of us happy, but forcing on and off all day has left me so frickin' tired and I can't tell if I just have a really bad headache from focusing for so long or if he's tryin' to use head pressure.
Guess that's all for today. See ya', guys.
So, uh, I guess this is a thing I'm gonna do?
Hi, I'm Box, and this is where I'm gonna record my life. I'm not the most interesting, really, but definitely I'm not boring either. My friends are all as crazy as I am, so that definitely keeps me on my toes.
My day has been relatively uninteresting. I've thrown a few different ideas around (dragon chortling and how I can improve mine, whether or not I should draw something new for my avatar since my art has improved since I drew my current one, different ways of meditation, ect.), eaten less food than I should (I hate my medicine), and fallen off of the couch at least five times just out of sheer boredom.
I'm still on the lookout for dragon-related crafts and projects and such that I can do with stuff lying around the house (we have no borax, unfortunately) but two days of searching with no good results is making me feel kinda like it's hopeless.
Also I 's raining again. What a surprise.