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So if you're taking time to read this, I assume you know I majorly identify as Eren Jaeger from the anime Attack on Titan. While i wholeheartedly know and almost believe I have 100% proof of it being my past life, my identity issues in this life due to trauma and related mental illnesses have caused me to once again see myself as him, despite the fact the world is very different in this timeline.
What most of you probably don't know is one of my boyfriends and I recently broke up. I'm polyamorous, so I have no problem with my boyfriends telling me they have interest in another person or multiple people. As long as I know, I'm happy and fine. But my ex went behind my back and became QPP's with someone. And that someone was an Eren double.
My ex boyfriend has known me since right around when I awoke as otherkin and fictionkin, and he knows that Eren is a major part of my identity. I have a hard time dealing with doubles. So, when he went behind my back and became queer platonic with someone (which isn't exactly cheating but he still should have told me), especially a double?? Man, you guys don't understand how betrayed I am.
And i informed him that he had to choose me or the other eren. And he told me that it wasnt "another eren" it was "eren. period"
It's still bothering me and it's been about a week. I needed to yell. Sorry. Eren
I was a pretty fat orangey-brown house cat, though I don't remember my name. I wasn't like Garfield or anything, I was moreso just a chubby active cat who tried its best. (I don't remember the gender I was as a cat either, but cats don't have concepts of gender so its all fine.)
I distinctly remember refusing to eat dry food, and I was very picky, only eating chicken cat food. My owners would have to slip cat suppliments into my food, and I knew they did, but I ate them to appease my owners.
I really liked the cat tower I had, and I'd spend my time mostly sitting in or sleeping in the topmost compartment.
I don't have a ton of memories of being a cat, but I desperately want to get more!! I'll make another post about being a cat when I get more memories! Eren
Personally, I love it when I get canon memories. Albeit, "canon memories" referring exclusively to fictionkin, in this case. I just call my other memories "Kin Memories".
The Kintype I have the most memories for is Eren Jaeger. This is sort of just a means for making my memories public for anyone to see. So, lets begin!
TRIGGER WARNINGS: violence, abuse, trauma, parent mentions, one NSFW joke mention
If you have any questions about my memories, feel free to ask!
Childhood memories before the fall of wall maria:
Armin and I had a "secret" hideout in the poorer area of our district, where we took over an old abandoned house in an otherwise active neighborhood. The neighbor to the right was a sweet old lady and the neightbor to the left was a nice middleage/older couple who had an apple tree in their front yard. They let us take apples and sometimes the old lady to the right would bake us sweet bread.
The roof had a hole in it that we climbed through from inside to sit atop it. At night, we would sit up their and eat our snacks, looking for constellations. One time, Armin and I had a joke contest to see who could find the most phallic looking constellations, and he found the most, so I called him "Master of the Dick Stars".
Mikasa and I were close, but it took a while for her to open up after I rescued her from her kidnappers. My dad helped her recuperate, and helped convince her we didn't mean any harm. She kept the scarf I gave her as a comfort object and refused to go almost anywhere without it. If she did, she made sure she had a piece of it that had fallen off in her pocket for comfort.
When my mom was eaten, we were close enough that some of the blood spray got on me. Not much, but a splash or two hit me. It made me unable to handle it and I literally shut down after that. I only have vague memories of boarding the ship and leaving the outer wall, and I barely came to when we were in safety. Irrational anger became a coping mechanism.
2. Training camp memories:
I shared a bunk with Armin, and Jean and Marco were in the hall next to ours. Berthold was above us, but he didn't share his bunk with anyone. Armin and I were placed together because of my budding PTSD, and they figured it'd be better if I didn't wake up the whole camp with my waking up to no one I knew being around me.
The bunks were uncomfortable at best, but it was better than the floor.
There was a rumor spread around camp that I had a crush on Jean after Armin's notes of literally "Sinner sinner Jean for dinner" were found littered around the collective dumpster pile in the area on a specific trash morning. I tried to get back at him by writing a note as best as I could in his hand writing saying "I want to eat potato (girl)". When the drill sargeant found it, he immediately blamed Connie. I came forward after Connie almost got punished as the one who wrote the note. I had to run laps before I could eat every day for two weeks, but it was totally worth it.
3. Squad Levi memories:
In court, Levi had literally kicked a tooth out of my mouth. It was one of my molars, and it was kind of a hindrance to get used to not having it. Eventually, I was fitted with a crude placeholder for the tooth, sort of a makeshift tooth replacing retainer type deal?
Levi was anything but a good leader. I was kept purely because I could be weaponized due to my titan shifting nature. I was treated as subhuman, and Levi took it upon himself to hurt me any chance he could get away with it. In the end, I ended up shutting down further and usually operating on autopilot.
I'll make another blog post when I gain some more memories. Eren