Ach, sorry for this vent. This isn't even otherkin-related, I'm just feeling down... depression is ####ty.
The last couple of days my motivation has dropped from low to zero... I just want to lie down and sleep forever. Except that I've been struggling to sleep too, so I just end up sitting around feeling sorry for myself and then hating myself for that.
This isn't me. I don't want to be like this. I'm not meant to be like this.
Why did I have to get stuck in this broken body? I can't deal with life because my mind is constantly working against me and it's driving me insane. And of course the only way I can fix this imbalance in my brain is by stuffing my body full of chemicals, and those have a bunch of other side affects that seem like they'd be just as bad as what I'm going through now (especially the tiredness. I'd rather feel down than perpetually tired).
Plus feeling down makes my social anxiety 1000000x worse to the point where I feel panicky even just talking to people online. Which cuts me off from my only human interaction besides my family.
And it messes with my kintypes too...
Stupid depression. :[
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