Ya know, I do still have it... this last grain of scepticism about my identity. Do I make it all up? It might not even make too much of a difference, but still it would be good to know. To have this final proof or disproof. I've met a couple of other dragons meanwhile. We all have some similar experiences and mindsets (strikingly similar in some cases), but also some very different ones. However I found that - as far as I can see - that doesn't make me more or less valid than everybody else. We're as much dragons as anyone can be in this world. I didn't know that - I didn't realize that when I first joined the community.
Yes, this last grain of doubt.. Would it be different if I was a system? I don't know how it feels to be a system. Many dragons I know are systems or have spiritual contact to other dragons or entities.
What I also know is that I usually tend to push away any other presence. When I'm awake, a spirit presence who would want to enter my mind would need to be really, really strong, and push its way through. Probably scream at me until I at all realize it's there, fight its way up even at the risk of hurting me. I wouldn't mind that. I'd be glad if there were such a spirit. So strong, so well distinguished from mine that I would know for sure I didn't imagine it. Friendly, but strong enough to knock me away from the front. Yeah, I guess it would feel good to have someone like this. But still there's only one voice in my mind.
So, this last grain of skepticism... should I keep it, consider it healthy? Or should I drop it, being a dragon without the slightest doubt? I think I'm not yet able to do the latter. I wonder if I will be as long as I'm in this body, on this earth. Would I like to? Yes... I guess so.
I'm a thoughtful derg tonight. Feel free to comment, as always!