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  3. --Alder
  4. Meme war's basically a game me and a dear friend made up, and it goes as following: A meme is posted, then the other posts another meme that's somehow related to the previous meme. If for instance I where to post a meme involving "O'rly?" The propper responce would be a meme saying "Yes, really" Or "I don't know, therefore aliens" Or something related to the picture, if it involved frogs one could post a Pepe the frog meme, etc.
  5. I don't know if it's really a "huge" endeavor, but I picked up ukulele as I've never learned how to play a string instrument. Self-taught, I've been able to make it to chord changes playing a few days a week over a couple months. It's small, cheap, and quiet enough to strum in an apartment without being too disruptive. I have a brother who used to be a skilled guitar player so I might switch in the future and ask if he's got time for occasional lessons. I haven't cleaned my apartment in a couple months - my boyfriend from a few states over is coming to visit in two weeks. I spent an hour cleaning the kitchen today. Makes me nostalgic for when I was living at home and sometimes I'd come back and my mother had just gone on a wild cleaning spree everywhere. I'm starting volunteer work with local city gardens in a few weeks, including a tree-planting day. I don't know if I'd call it a project so much as a hopeful career move into horticulture, gardening, or related work.
  6. In Minnesota, where "up North" is just another 2-3 hours North.
  7. Hey I would like some new friends here, just send me a PM ....My interests are many, but I don't like politics or sports that much.
  8. Suddenly thought "catatumbo" and it wouldn't get off my mind, so I looked it up Catatumbo is a real place on the border of Colombia and Venezuela it looks like
  9. Looks like I am practicing dæmonism again.

  10. Born and raised in Ontario, Canada, and have yet to visit anywhere else.
  11. I was raised in Texas, born in a city whose name I cannot remember and moved to San Antonio at two. Currently living in a city next to Fayetteville, Arkansas after having moved from there.
  12. Born-and-bred in Chicago, Illinois.
  13. I had to remake this because...for some reason, I cannot delete entries anymore and stuff so I had to delete the whole damned thing. Anyway, going over past entries again... May 14, 2017 I started having "you're a coyote" dreams again. These usually end up with me later realizing when I am awake that I still have a coyote theriotype. I'm usually visited by an old man and he looks me in the eyes and says in a somewhat menacing tone, "I know your kind too well. I can tell that you sure as hell are a coyote." I'm not sure who this old man is. I am never thinking of the possibility of myself being a coyote before I have these recurring dreams so I doubt it has anything to do with me processing things subconsciously. I don't know if he is some kind of guide or what. He seems menacing but not dishonest. Perhaps the bit of menace is misinterpreted and he is just sick of me tricking myself up over and over if he is a guide. I'll take a pendulum to this later on. The accuracy of a pendulum varies depending on the person using it and tends to be more accurate if you are using it yourself as it connects to the parts of the subconscious. I have to remember the message of The Daemon Tarot when I inquired on figuring out otherkin stuff. "Focus on being honest with yourself" said Orobas. Who am I to argue with that advice? I am no one to argue, that's who. I'm trying very hard to be honest with myself. It seems I only have a firm enough grasp on being Handsome Jack because I am also doubting that I'm a demon as well as doubting that I'm a cat. I am not a cat. I am someone who absorbed their behavior and has a general -hearted connection to the family Felidae as a whole. Claiming to be a demon gives me some really bad feelings. Those feel like I'm not being honest with myself and simply mistaking myself for a demon based on the connections I feel (towards the Goetics, specifically). If someone can mistake their totems & guides for theriotypes and what not, why can't I mistake myself for a demon based on similar criteria? This really throws me for a loop. Coyote doesn't feel separate from me. As far as I can tell, there is no coyote influence in my life. The only thing resembling a coyote is myself on some non-physical level. An interesting blending of both human and coyote with varying degrees of fluctuations in which one is felt more strongly than the other. I'm usually always slightly more coyote than human. I base this off of what I have learned about the species as animals rather than as symbols. The symbolism and folklore is to be left for someone else to deal with. It isn't for me and I really don't find it too applicable to what I am. There's nothing special about being a coyote to me. I just cannot see what most others see about being a coyote. Maybe I'm just looking at it too objectively but coyotes are coyotes, whether therianthropes or not, nothing more and nothing less. I guess this may as well be the point where I stop caring and just resign myself to the fate of being a coyote therian who has too many extremely theriotype-esque cameo shifts (both involuntary and self-induced). May 16, 2017 I mentioned this before that I would have dreams during my denial phases of Grumpy Old Man coming up to me and telling me that I'm a coyote and I know it so I need to stop trying not to be a coyote. These only happen during denial. Whether he is a part of my subconscious or a spirit guide of some kind is up for debate. I did receive what I believe to have been a sign after the most recent dream. I never asked for a sign, it just appeared at random as I was checking out one of the Spotify playlists I follow (if you have Spotify and are curious, it was on the the "Indie Folk: Western Vistas"). The song's name is "Coyote Caller" by Joshua James. I'm not sure how the lyrics fit in exactly. I don't think they actually do. I think I was supposed to pay attention to the name and it did indeed call me in to listen to it out of my curiosity. Coyote caller, indeed and not a bad song...I recommend it. I'm going to accept this sign. I have a feeling that due to the fact that I have resigned myself to my fate of being a coyote therian with no other therio/kintypes who also happens to be Handsome Jack...I'm not going to get a third sign. I think, if Grumpy Old Man is a guide, he influenced the placement of the sign. He knows the best places to put such signs so I find them. On a different note, I was thinking about how many other coyote therians seem to intertwine mythology/archetypal symbolism into their narratives on being a coyote. I don't understand it. I tried to do the same before and that just seemed very unnatural, clunky. My experience of being a coyote also differs so much and I cannot explain accurately in words. I simply cannot tell you what being a coyote is like for me. Being a coyote just is. Being a coyote is not being an archetype or myth or symbol. I am not any of the things those coyotes I am thinking of claim to be. I am coyote with no mythology or symbolism attached. May 18, 2017 For whatever reason, I tend to associate songs with my 'types. I don't even have a reason known to myself for why I associate songs with my theriotype. With my fictotype, it is a lot easier to understand and see my reasoning. In this entry, I have decided to share a few of those songs (the not-so-obvious ones in the case of my theriotype, though). Listen at your own discretion since some of these songs do have strong language and/or violent/dark themes Coyote Songs: "Fear" by X Ambassadors "My Silver Lining" by First Aid Kit "Desert Song" by Edward Sharpe and The Magnetic Zeros "Barton Hollow" by The Civil Wars "No One to Nothing" by Mother Mother "Land of Broken Promises" by IAMX Handsome Jack Songs: "Another Way Out" by Hollywood Undead "The World Ender" by Lord Huron "Left Hand Free" by Alt-J "I'm Only Joking" by KONGOS "Superpower" by X Ambassadors "Satin in a Coffin" by Modest Mouse "Viva La Vida" by Coldplay Somehow Overlapping Songs: "Glitter & Gold" by Barns Courtney "It Will Come Back" by Hozier There are others but I am too lazy to add more to this. Maybe later.
  14. "Crucify my name
    I never felt more famous than today, where I am no one
    To nothing


    And though I’ve been told
    You gotta keep your spirit close
    I let mine go
    You, well maybe you could too"- Mother Mother ("No One to Nothing")

  15. "Nope"
  16. Apparently having physical therapy once or twice a day for a few weeks can double or triple my metabolism... Well that's fantastic considering I can't get food often, hah. And how lazy I am when it comes to actually getting off my ass to eat. Yay. At least maybe I'll start losing weight for once.. ;-;

    I also need to draw more, and collect every single fire item on Impressive World (no one knows the game, RIP)

    Why do I post statuses

  17. "Rat farts"
  18. I feel like a happy puppy now that I'm getting back to rp again

    1. Sickly Substance

      Sickly Substance

      Roleplaying can be fun, or even a good way to relax if you've been wound up by remembering you're stuck in a human body, for example.

  19. "I'm alive?" - For some reason, this short phrase tends to spontaneously pass through our mind. Has for years and years on a regular basis. It is always a question asked in an unsure manner. Never thought as a statement. Always an unsure question. We're not sure why. - Maya (female, jaguar)
  20. From the album Digital WIPs We'd like to Show

    A WIP version of what the main villain for the (non-canon/AU) Avatar/PuyoPuyo story of "Sute sanhìyä" will look like. All that's missing for now is his color scheme... ... And, yes... He's somewhat of an anthro-Toruk by design... XD Basically, he's Pandora's equivalent to the Dark Prince. In this case, Neftxä is the king of demons and the darker depths of the Puyo Puyo Underworld of Pandora. ... Not a guy you'd like to cross or meet in a dark alley by any means.
  21. I was born premature to a woman with one eye and ichthyosis and a blind father. Was born breech, left handed and the only boy in the ward. Am currently operating on only the bottom half of each lung due to emphysema
  22. Yesterday
  23. Just a song to play in the background while I focus on practising on my anatomy while drawing.
  24. I keep getting the Japanese word "Aishite" ("Love me") stuck in my head because of the song. Now I'm thinking of covering it in English! I even rewrote the English translation so that it's singable and keeps to the tune of the original. --Alder
  25. Oh my god I'm so pissed off at the blog system right now I need to punch stuff so bad

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