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  1. 1 point
    So I had a routine MRI scan not long ago. I get them every year due to my MS. Generally they're fine and as I'd not really had any relapses last year I figured this one would be fine too. But no, apparently I have quite a lot of new lesions in my brain and brain stem so, that's pretty worrying. Because of the coronavirus situation certain meds aren't available either, as they lower your immune system considerably and aren't deemed as safe right now. So my new med options are not really options. Just one I'm eligible for but hopefully it'll be good. I have a phone appointment with my nurse in a couple of weeks so I'll talk things over with her then. In the meantime I guess I'll just try not to let it worry me too much! But, ugh. Not the news I was hoping for.
  2. 1 point
    I've read your last posts including the update about the wings and the collar/sleep issue. I'm honestly not sure what to make of this, but I have... mixed feelings. First of all, "soul alteration" does not necessarily sound like a good thing for my ears, to say the least. Also, a rider/dragon relation should not.. quite be like this, I think. There should be mutual trust (as you mention yourself), both sides should gain from it, and the partners should be on the same level. One partner being the rider should not mean they're "ruling" over the other, but just mean there is a mutual agreement about it. True horsemanship should look the same in my opinion. But Karston putting a sleeping spell on you, binding your wings tight without explaining and leaving you alone for six days, that's... it doesn't fit. It would make sense if your wings were injured, but they're not. This is not what a rider should do. It makes me feel really uneasy. I wonder what makes you think that your soul ended up being here by accident? Couldn't it have been your intention? Is that wild side of yours really dangerous, is it really wise to restrain it? I understand that a part of you seems happy to be restrained, but another part obviously isn't. Did this happen before? Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying Karston is doing it wrong, I only say that I'm totally unsure about it. I hope that at least he knows what he's doing, but I honestly have my doubts. Let's face it: he could be traumatized by what happened to the two you. Is he still acting within reason? I could also go for a psychological instead of a spiritual interpretation but tbh the result would be pretty much the same... I really don't know if this is helpful or not. I just try to put my feelings into words, idk if they're right or wrong. In any case, feel free to PM me anytime if you'd like to discuss in private.
  3. 1 point
    @Henk I would be happy to chat about dragons and riders! I'll send you a PM. That is a very interesting update. I had started to think that perhaps the fact that your species was a domesticated kind of dragon that maybe having your wings bound wouldn't particularly bother you once you got used to it. Seems I was wrong in that assumption. Though it does remind me a bit of when my pet cat had to wear a collar. It took her a while to get used to it and right at first she was always trying to get it off and would carry the tag around in her mouth. Right when I thought she was getting used to it, she managed to undo the buckle and brought it to me as if to say "Here, you can have this back now." She eventually did get used to it and forgot about it, but collars are far less restricting than what you're experiencing where you can't fully use two limbs.
  4. 1 point
    We are now on Discord - officially. The Kinmunity and Naia's Den Discord servers are now one in the same. This move was done order to help members of both servers communicate, relate, find friends, and educate each other during times of isolation. The result is a unified community! Kinmunity users will enjoy instant access, as well as the ability to view KM-only areas of the server. CLICK HERE TO JOIN!
  5. 0 points
    This was something to read and well... It was hard for me to read it. And ever harder to let it play out in my head. Oh my! Having your wings cut off, that does make a lot of sense as to why you have fear of heights right now. My wings are currently bound and well, I do have a fear of heights as well at the moment. I mean something as simple as walking down the stairs does make me feel more uneasy than before. This past-life death story was quite a read and I hope it doesn't have so much impact on your current life. It made me very uneasy, to say the least.
  6. 0 points
    I must say, this was a very uneasy read. I can really understand the subconscious constant need to try to wiggle your wings, and being hyper aware of them because of the change. I, like Amber, would certainly never have been able to allow anyone to do such a thing. I would probably also seriously injure myself trying to get such bindings off. But clearly I'm a much different type of dragon than you are. While my species could and did bond with riders, the relationship seems to be much different to what you have with your rider. I'm very interested to learn more about your relationship with him!
  7. 0 points
    It's interesting to see that I triggered others to read the book, haha! It would seem you made this post after reading the chapter about the Ego, so I think your assessment will change and refine as you continue reading. In particular you may find that psychology and spirituality are closely interlinked, to say the least. In the last paragraph you mention an "actual ego" which seems to relate to Jungs concept of the "true self". Unfortunately Stein covers it only in one of the last chapters. This also relates to the "greater whole". The statement "I am that I am" would be typical for an entity that represents the true self although it overemphazises the term "I" a bit. Also, statements like "All is one, and one is me" or similar could apply. It's the kind of thought that comes about in the "Nirvana-like" state of mind many practitioners (including me) seem to have reached, where Ego and True Self are fused. In your last paragraph, you managed to describe it with striking precision, and again the fact that we all perceive this in a very similar way imo indicates that such a thing really exists for all of us. I'm actually not sure whether Jung's perception implies that there is one true self per each individual Ego, or a single true self as a "greater unified whole" for everybody. The Nirvana concept implies the latter and many spiritual people seem to believe so. But in Stein's book, a unified whole true self is indicated at some points, while individual true selves are at others. To my own interpretation, both may be the case at the same time depending on how you look at it. Imagine our true selves like parts of a fractal which in total represents the whole Multiverse. If you take a closer look to one such part, you'll find that it's of the same structure as the whole thing, as is the nature of a fractal. That pretty much matches my impression: every consciousness represents self and all at the same time, depending how you look on it. Resulting in the paradox statements mentioned above. I see the Ego as a focal point - or, to this end, one out of potentially many focal points - of an associated true self, or as I call it mindscape. To me, a mindscape is a transcendent multiversal structure which exists beyond reality and is attached to a consciousness. This matches Jungs definition of true self and the structure that is called "Nirvana". But I don't second the idea that the Ego would dissolve and vanish into that structure although it might seem that way. In my opinion the Ego is rather made whole yet again, which is again backed by Jung's theories. When it comes to the "unconscious storage" you describe, you will stumble across the Jungian term "collective unconscious". To my great disappointment, this is one of the terms Stein doesn't cover too well. The implicit explanation is that it represents unconscious knowledge that was accumulated through generations and can be accessed by a member of a species (Stein seems to apply it to humans only). But when we look at therians I find it unlikely that such collective unconscious would be limited to a species barrier - it would rather appear that it entails the accumulated knowledge of everything that ever existed. Which inevitably reminds me of @Charias' "spirit-me" which is an entity that seems to record this knowledge like a huge database. I too was fascinated by the fact Jung acknowledges the existence of independent psychic complexes that can not be controlled by the Ego. I think members of plural systems represent Egos that may belong to multiple true selves or to one single true self. All of this gives rise to the question what actually a "human" is. I think the transcendent true self can not ultimately be tagged with a specific species, even if Stein at many points leaves the impression that he applies the concept more or less exclusively to humans (which is something I totally disagree on). So, maybe the structure of the psyche is what defines a human. This thesis is backed by the fact that some psychic complexes described by Stein don't seem to be present or only very weakly present in my psyche, most notably the concept of the anima. I found the way to my True Self without invoking the anima/us complex as it seems.
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