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This has been plaguing me for a while now, so I decided I'd write about it here. I had a memory of when I was my kintype come to me about a year ago. I've had many others since, but this one has stood out for being more complex, and rather unpleasant. Here it is: I was in a field, standing in the shadow of a large tree behind me. There were mountains in the distance. It was a sunny day, only a few clouds in the sky. There was a tree not too far in front of me, and a rock to my front right. My past self's/kintype's adoptive father was standing in front of me. He was very distraught, pleading with me, crying even. He was begging me, "Why won't you let us be happy? Why do you choose to do this? We could've been happy! Please don't do this!" I felt no sympathy for him, only a callous anger. I held out my hand, and must've used some sort of magic to push him into the tree that was in front of me. Then I drew a sword and ran him through. I killed him. That was the end of that memory. I've been trying to figure out why I did it for a year now. I've done a lot of meditating, yet the answer has yet to reveal itself. From what I understand from other memories, I didn't seem to have a problem with any other family member, just him apparently. And I haven't had any other memories with him in it. I don't know. I'm hoping the answer will show itself eventually, I can't really force it I guess.
