KnightFenrirWulfhart
The Dark Thief Of Knowledge
- Bones
- 🦴0.00BN
I have been reminscing about an old friend I used to have in high school, who was a devout Mormon.
A little background, I was dating then my now-husband online, so it was a lot easier to say I was gay even though I'm ace, and she knew and was totally accepting of me, and was a great friend.
Anyway, one day she comes up to me while we were in small-town literature class when it was goof off time, and she's like "Thomas, you know we're friends right?" Which was super weird and out of nowhere, so I'm like, "...Yeah...why?" And she looks so sad, and dead seriously looks me in the eyes, "I don't want you to go to Hell, but you're going to. But I think you're a great person!"
I honestly started laughing. She looked confused about that, but I couldn't help but laugh because she was so devastated by the very thought.
"Honestly, I don't mind either way. If I'm going to Hell, then all that practice taking boiling hot showers will be useful!" I know she didn't say it because she disliked me, or even disliked gays, but she was very devout, and really believed in her religion. I continued, "I don't believe in Hell, so it doesn't bother me. And if it does exist, then well, I might even enjoy it. Don't feel bad over it, if it does exist, then there was nothing you could do about it, I've sinned enough to purchase some real estate down there, and I'll be sure to write to you to tell you that you were right. And if it doesn't, then no big deal."
I've never seen her look so absolutely confused, but I made her feel better.
I have a song about it to share with anyone who has been told they're going to hell.
Hell In A Handbasket - Voltaire
Hope it can make someone laugh like it makes me laugh.
If I'm going to Hell, then I'll welcome Lucifer as a brother, and take my place there rightfully. As Machiavelli (possibly) said: "I desire to go to hell, and not to heaven. In the former place I shall enjoy the company of popes, kings, and princes, while in the latter are only beggars, monks, hermits, and apostles."
A little background, I was dating then my now-husband online, so it was a lot easier to say I was gay even though I'm ace, and she knew and was totally accepting of me, and was a great friend.
Anyway, one day she comes up to me while we were in small-town literature class when it was goof off time, and she's like "Thomas, you know we're friends right?" Which was super weird and out of nowhere, so I'm like, "...Yeah...why?" And she looks so sad, and dead seriously looks me in the eyes, "I don't want you to go to Hell, but you're going to. But I think you're a great person!"
I honestly started laughing. She looked confused about that, but I couldn't help but laugh because she was so devastated by the very thought.
"Honestly, I don't mind either way. If I'm going to Hell, then all that practice taking boiling hot showers will be useful!" I know she didn't say it because she disliked me, or even disliked gays, but she was very devout, and really believed in her religion. I continued, "I don't believe in Hell, so it doesn't bother me. And if it does exist, then well, I might even enjoy it. Don't feel bad over it, if it does exist, then there was nothing you could do about it, I've sinned enough to purchase some real estate down there, and I'll be sure to write to you to tell you that you were right. And if it doesn't, then no big deal."
I've never seen her look so absolutely confused, but I made her feel better.
I have a song about it to share with anyone who has been told they're going to hell.
Hell In A Handbasket - Voltaire
Hope it can make someone laugh like it makes me laugh.
If I'm going to Hell, then I'll welcome Lucifer as a brother, and take my place there rightfully. As Machiavelli (possibly) said: "I desire to go to hell, and not to heaven. In the former place I shall enjoy the company of popes, kings, and princes, while in the latter are only beggars, monks, hermits, and apostles."
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