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Have you ever felt like you’ve gone to far with your instincts?

RealLizardKing

New member
Pronouns
Masculine
Have any of you gone down to your roots so deep that you think you may have gone to far? Yesterday evening I think my lizard side took full control because I found myself laying in a nice basking spot. (A rather large rock in my back yard.) Completely naked XD.

feel free to share if you’ve ever lost control or felt like you were going to.
 

Red-in-Tooth

Machairodont Felid
+Primal Member
VIP
Therianthrope
Golden Shield
Pronouns
Masculine
There is such a thing as going too far to the point of losing oneself and in endemic inner medicine, this is often described as the "losing of one's soul" or in archaic psychology, having some form of "break" or "episode". For us in this community, we at large understand it as an extreme form of "shift" or better described more accurately as a "manifestation", a term I am prone to choose because it more adequately describes the phenomena. That said, the furthest extents of this are generally approached with great caution as there should be no real loss of sense of self or control, what is often called although obviously inadequately as a "berserker shift". A noncognitive event of worrying significance could be a sign of an issue that urgently needs treatment by a practicing psychologist, medical doctor, or spiritual counselor, because completely losing oneself and the awareness of events can be very dangerous.

With such a preface in mind, I know of what that place is like and how difficult it is to skirt the fringes of it. Like a plane whose engines have fallen into stall and the nose of which has plummeted, the intense sensation of being left to ride the event with virtually no control in a dive is alarming to say the least, as it is an exercise in attempting to reignite some method of guidance from wingtip to wingtip or at the very least the rudder. Accompanying this is the same sort of sense of gravity and the effort to pull back and out of the dive, as though one is holding on for all dear life as they truly are, because once total loss of sensibility is had, there really is no telling what comes next. For myself, that was entirely an experience of being just on the threshold, going in and out from the psychic forces at work and the absolutely off the rails sense of spiritual high, which felt like it was only more prone to somehow dive harder, the weight of it going down and down further. It was not as though I lacked an awareness of the alarms or dangers, rather it is that I as with some feel it so genuinely, that I know where I could ultimately end up if I did not integrate myself. In the end, the ultimate experience was to learn what the limit was and is, and the importance of becoming one continuous reintegrated, actualized, individuated being. I needed to become one with my instincts, my nature, not become them myself and this is because of the world we live in and the lives we live in it; we are still bodily human, as well as encircled at every turn in the human world. Losing ourselves here is not just an emotional, mental, and spiritual danger, it could very much be a physical one.

But with this experience and brush with disaster came an important lesson, one which I preach incessantly, that being the weight of how singularly important it is to know as much as possible, then to understand it. The first is simple, the second is difficult, and the third in the form of applying it is the most difficult. Had I not done this, I would likely have been lost to the thrall of frenzy - the kind of truly seeing "red". It taught me why I needed to apply it and so I did, which in turn created a series of following experiences into my maturity of the matter and self-exploration which allowed that same type of extreme event to be avoided. When I learned to stalk and balance my heft and weight upon my feet, to not disturb the earth as much as I could manage, and to mirror the movements of my targets so as to better leave them unaware, I felt the chill within my blood take me. A deprivation of that raging, uncontrolled heat before, wherein that same energy became focused, purposeful, distinct, controlled. Still very much being beyond my normal means but not being completely outside myself and lost to what I do next.

For a cat, this is an important lesson to learn. Cubs play haphazardly, roughly, they bite and claw too hard as they find their bodies, and many a young hunter engages in overkill or mangles their quarry until they discover how to further articulate themselves. A number other animals do this too, capitalized most upon by mammals, I am aware, but it is hard to convey it in means I do not know and in what appears to be any plainer and simpler an example.
 

Drakmanka

Active member
Genderfluid Pride
Asexual Pride
Otherkin
Pronouns
Other
I would say the closest I ever came to going "too far" in terms of getting too involved with my instincts was when I was fairly newly awakened and still exploring my identity. I was about 16 or 17 and had spend about 20 minutes focusing inward on my dragon identity, trying to trigger a phantom shift, when suddenly my mom poked her head in my room and asked if I wanted to go for a walk with her. There is a walking path in my home town that was specially built and maintained for walking, running, and cycling. It passes through largely natural areas, though there are some apartments here and there that back up to it as well. It has a bridge that passes over the railroad tracks and highway that pass through town. My mom tends to blather while walking, so I was half-listening to her chatter while still focusing on trying to feel my wings better. As we reached the bridge, it happened: Suddenly I had an almost overwhelming instinctive urge to jump off the bridge. It wouldn't have been particularly easy to do, as the bridge has cement barriers to protect people from crashing their bikes and flying off the bridge, and on the other side of that is an 8-foot-tall chain-link fence. But the urge was there. I had a plan to climb up the fence using my (non-existent, but don't tell my instincts that) claws for grip, perch on the top using phantom wings and tail for balance, and then launch myself off. The whole plan involved flying, of course.
I have to assume it was the altitude that triggered this, as the bridge was a good 40 feet above the ground below. In years since, I've explored this instinct and have found that while it's never been quite so overpowering since, I do have a strong instinct to jump off of tall things. I've started using it when I need to climb up on the roof for maintenance and such, because the human part of me gets vertigo from heights.
 

FoxyAnimations

Well-known member
Otherhearted
Shadow Dog
Therianthrope
Alterhuman
Fictionkin
Furry
Otherkin
Pronouns
Other
Never happened, but since my both my theriotypes are considered predators or carnivores, something might happen in the future. And with my fictotype, he is infected (aka its complicated) so he attacks anything that moves on the spot, so that's uh.. An oof right there.
 

Kirby_and_Impish

Well-known member
Genderflux Pride
Otherkin
Therianthrope
Pronouns
Masculine
Well one time when I was in control the humans of this dumb household were making me really mad and I had the urge to kill them. I probably would have if Kirbs didn't intervene. Idk why he puts up with those idiots.
- ⚠️
 

Lestia

New member
Pronouns
Neutral
Well... My system can control itself... but it's too hard, I think there is something different in our body or some alter...Instincts are too strong and makes us to suffer
 
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