Is this normal for otherkin?

[Addy-River]

I don't know if I'm spiritual or psychological. I'm very spiritual about my soulbonding and don't fully understand the psychological side of things because my brain just doesn't work that way. I only understand the metaphysical and spiritual side of stuff. But I don't know where my otherkin identity fits in at. I'm not even 100% sure I am otherkin. I consider myself a catgirl and take that form in our headspace, when I can actually visualize myself, I also get phantom ears all the time. But I'm unsure about all of it. Is it normal to not know which side you fit into? My core beliefs say I should be spiritual about it, but it doesn't feel like a spiritual thing to me. I can be spiritual about my soulbonding, but otherkin just is what it is. I'm a catgirl and thats all there is to it. Its not something I'm spiritual about, but it also doesn't feel psychological cause my mind doesn't seem to factor into it. I am what I am. I don't feel spiritual or psychological about being human, thats just what I am in this world. Maybe I was never a catgirl before and only started to be one in this world and this life. That would make it more psychological. I don't believe I've had past lives. Its all really confusing to me.

 

[Avonmora]

Well, as I see it, spiritual therianthropy/kinnity can be caused by a number of things. Reincarnation, misplaced souls, soul pieces, and other instances, but I think these seem to be the most 'popular' theories on the spiritual side. As for psychological, this is something I've been trying to figure out myself, but I've asked some people and have done some of my own thinking on this. Psychological kinnity may very well just be: I was born therian/kin, nothing more, nothing less, just as you are born a human and a sex. You're perception of yourself may change, but it's just something you were born as. It may also be that you've grown up around cats and have, over time, begun to develop cat-like habits and have come to identify as a cat. Or, perhaps, you may have imprinted on cats from a young age and it has since become a part of who you are, similar to the theory prior. 

As for whether or not you're kin, only you can come to that conclusion. But, a word from someone who's struggled with this: You may at times feel human and at other times animal. It is rare that I ever feel fully wolf and, having grown up in a human society with human things, there are times where I feel human. But there is no denying that I have non-human experiences. Whether these are figments of my subconscious imagination or whether they are truly a part of me, I've come to settle on that I identify as a human with the mindset of what I perceive to be a wolf, or, in other terms, that I identify as a wolf. 

Gah, I feel like that was worded really formally, but yeah, I hope you figure things out! It won't be easy and your own opinions might change from time to time, but in the end you are who you are!  Good luck!

 

[kasdeya]

From what I understand, the spiritual/psychological divide is more about how you choose to explain your identity. When asked where it came from, "I don't know" is a perfectly valid answer. You don't need to put yourself in one category or the other. And - in my opinion - none of us really understand otherkinity anyway. We're all just guessing.

Personally, when I say that I'm a psychological otherkin, what I'm really saying is: "I don't believe in the supernatural, so it has to be something psychological instead." If you do believe in the supernatural then it really could go either way. Or some third way that we haven't even thought of yet.

So I guess what I'm trying to say is: The psychological vs. spiritual thing is mostly academic. You don't need to worry about it if you don't want to, but if you do, prepare for lots of uncertainty.

 

[Elluenda]

Kasdeya is right in saying that the 'divide' is mostly in how you choose to explain your identity. It's also not a really strong 'divide' here on Kinmunity; for example, I understand my kin identity in both spiritual ways and psychological ways.
I know for a fact that my neglectful home environment as a child led me to live more in my head than in the material world--I felt shunned and ignored, which caused me to miss the phase of Identifying-With my family, cultural, and species group. Because I did not identify as a white human from kentucky in a christian-cultural region, I had to fill that void with something else--at the time, even though i did not use those words, I was Alienkin. Psychologically, I know I did not Fit In Here: There fore, I Must Be From Somewhere Else. It took on a spiritual element as a mythology of HOW an alien become a young human girl.
I'm also just generally a spiritual person and have my own personal religion. I believe that my Goddess has made me in her image, as I am an expression of Her Infinite Forms. She has made me a human body to live in this human world, and has given me contact with my Elven/Fae/Spiritual soul so that I will awaken to my true duty as her Servant. In this way, I see "Elf" and "Fae", my kintypes, as symbols for why she has made me this way and symbols for what my task is--to serve Her body as planet Earth and Nature.

Somebody with a different life path and a spiritual outlook similar to mine may have different symbols for their holy duty on this planet--for example, I have a beloved friend whose social role is to be a trickster. He reminds people around them that their beliefs are not solid stone and that they need to double check their priorities and whether they are doing the right thing by shining a rude, joking light on their assumptions. If he knew of kin, I am fairly certain he would be Coyote and Faekin. He's a spiritual person but does not follow a rote religion because structure chafes him lol.

There are others whose spiritual perspective on their kintype is more that they have been reincarnated in a sequence of lives, and sometimes another life of theirs very strongly influences this one; usually implying that their Soul is wise and is giving them "wolf flavor" or "cat flavor" or "dinosaur flavor" or "unicorn flavor" or "car flavor" or "cartoon-character flavor" in order to give them tools and perspectives to live This Life in a way of spiritual benefit. Or--it could also just be unintentional, and that's just how reincarnation works, and it's not to "live a better life for the Soul"! Depends on the person.

A person with a more psychological perspective on their kintype may say "Well, it clearly makes sense that my kintype is a shark. I have a cutting wit and a need to explore and wander, and I love depths and mystery and the simplicities of Not Knowing What is Below, and mammal-like people don't always understand me. I really really really feel like I AM what a shark represents than what a human represents." Or "I just get so many recurring memories of being a dog. I really feel like I'm THERE when I have these memories, and it shows up a lot in my everyday life. I can't beat this feeling that I AM this dog I keep thinking of or remembering." <--That one is an example of a non-spiritual perspective that includes dreams or memories of a different lifetime without a reincarnation belief requirement.

You don't have to know Right Now And Forever the origin and mechanisms of your kinness. Those may change over time--for example, I was originally SOLELY spiritual about my kinness, but over time have understood more and more the psychological influences on my awakening and kintypes and perspectives. Just pay attention to your experience and abandon all "shoulds." See what's really there when you remove pretenses and observe your experiences. You may find that you FEEL catgirl kin, but that the word "catgirlkin" doesn't seem to fully convey how you feel about your experiences--you don't have to use any certain words. For example, I don't like "elfkin" for myself. I like "of elvenkind", like a cultural description. I'm cool with faekin though! It just takes listening to your unique life.

Good luck and please ask any further questions around the forum! You don't have to have yourself 500% figured out to enjoy your time here and the community.

 

[Addy-River]

Thank you everyone. This helped a lot. I know I'm a catgirl of some kind, but whether its spiritual or psychological doesn't matter. I guess I felt like I had to be one or the other and I needed past lives to be valid. I have no memories of being a catgirl, thats just what I feel like. Thats the form I take in our headspace. I feel phantom cat ears a lot. I guess it doesn't matter where I fit at, just what I feel.

 

[Red-in-Tooth]

I see no inherent divide between the psychological and the spiritual, if anything I see them as explanations and ends to one another.

The realm of psychology is a scientific study but even that is very loose still compared to other sciences because it is so innately more complex. Man knows more about mathematics and physics and biology than he does his own mind, so much so it is very difficult to quantify anything in psychology as hard fact. There are many hypothesise, fewer theories, and virtually no laws in the realm of psychology, which is why using it as a tool to understand the true self is very much a process of feeling it out and finding that which works. Again, while science only deals in and works with that which it can observe and test, then replicate, psychology is a difficult beast in that sense because the immense interconnection between every facet of it. So it becomes an aid in this case on determine where the source of these experiences come from rather than a pure, outright explanation.

Yet how does that fit with something inherently ethereal and intangible as spirituality? Simply put, it is a way to help validate those experiences in a medium and method that can be conveyed, as well as understood in what is known about reality, what can be confirmed so far as science is concerned. However, what good is that one might ask? Does belief not trump everything on matters of faith? Not quite, no, as imagine if one can demonstrate and point to something and go, "Yes, it is related to this, but more." If one can delve into understanding the relations, everything can be put into increasing order rather than one muddied mess.

So it becomes no more "Do I believe this about myself or is it true?" and more, "If this is true and I can denote it is, then that lends credit toward another part of the self."

So what to do in the case described? Begin by asking questions and being reductive - a word taboo now but the fundamentals of science - about each piece. Think about and go to those places about the how and why. Pray on it, meditate on it, analyze every answer and keep asking deeper, "But why is that?" Although be prepared, @Addy-River, you will realistically need dig deep into the self to find the true self and not all the answers from any one camp are going to be pleasant.