Steal the Banana

InkyDaily

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Dec 6, 2018
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There's a banana, everyone wants this banana. So much so, they will do whatever it takes to steal said banana. 

Example) Person one: Has the banana.

Person two: Takes the banana and takes a boat to a secluded island

person three: Flies in on a plane and snatches the nanner

and so on

The banana rests on its ancient podium. Let the games begin!

 

CopperCoyote

Member
Jan 10, 2019
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I travel to Berlin, Germany where your time machine is old and abandoned in a cave.  I fix up the time machine and use it travel back to that podium three days before you get there and steal the banana first.  

The time machine then disappears because you never used it to go back in time to Berlin.  So I break into Area 51 where I jump through a portal to Mars, destroying the portal behind me.

 
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InkyDaily

Ink Hybrid
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Dec 6, 2018
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I show up in an Imperial star destroyer. Using the force, I take the banana and quickly jump into hyperspace.

 

CopperCoyote

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Fortunately, Han, Luke and Chewbacca were hot on your tail.  and crash landed on Mars right behind you.  The Millennium Falcon wasn't in terrible shape so we all hopped in and hyperspaced right after you.  We landed in Cloud City where I found you inches away from eating the banana.  Lacking any force powers, I knocked you out the old fashioned way (a fist to the face) and stole the banana along with the Millenium Falcoln.  I then proceeded to travel at hyperspeed through a wormhole into the Marvel universe where I landed at the Collector's stash of random junk and hid the banana somewhere among that mess.

 
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South_Claw

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Mar 30, 2019
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I teleported there with a dog specialized in sniffing out bananas. We quickly find the banana. 

I take the banana and disappear into the void without a trace.

The dog is fine.

 

CopperCoyote

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Jan 10, 2019
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I follow you, stealing your dog and naming him Kevin.  With the dog's help, I jump through one wormhole after another, jumping all over the multiverse until I eventually find you in the void.  I catch the banana in the Millennium Falcon's tractor beam, leaving you adrift in the cold empty sea of blackness that is the void . . . without the banana.  I then jump through a wormhole at hyper-speed, leaving you behind.

Turns out the wormhole led to Mars.  The Doom version of Mars.  And it was immediately opposite to another portal leading to the ninth circle of Hell.  

Ignoring the big oops, I make the best of the situation, giving the banana to Satan.  Good luck getting it back from him.

Your gonna need it

 
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South_Claw

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But you see, Satan is my comrade. 

I kindly ask Satan for the banana. He agrees if I go to lunch with him on Saturday. 

I coat the banana in an anti-scent spray so that Kevin or any other dog for that matter may not find it. I then eat the banana, and disappear into another universe.

Good luck getting it from my stomach

Mwuahahahahaha

 

Mazkl

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Oct 3, 2018
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I develop a spiritual link with the bacteria in your stomach and somehow force it to skip every stage of evolution to become a human man named John. John then bursts from your stomach, banana in hand, and runs off in a state of confusion and panic.

Once he finally calms down, John meets a travelling samurai and learns his ways, then kills him on accident with a brick he found. John travels to the top of a snowy mountain, wielding the katana of his dead friend in one hand and the brick he killed him with in the other, and sews the banana to his body as he waits for his next challenger.

 

CopperCoyote

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Luckily, I know taekwondo (I actually do btw).  I climb the mountain.  At the top, I knock John off his feet with a well placed round kick.  Then, before he can get back up, in one swift movement, I rip the katana from his grasp and use it to chop his head off.   

I then rip the banana off his corpse, taking it with me in a time traveling submarine to the bottom of the ocean in the year 500,674BC

 

South_Claw

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I repair my stomach via crazy cool space surgery and tip my surgeon. I also have my stomach bacteria medically replaced. 

I use a crazy powerful metal detector to find where your ship is located. I use my second wish from a genie to teleport the submarine and suspend it where I can easily get to it. 

I rip it open with my claws, and steal the banana back. I then encase it in a lava-proof casing and throw it into the bottom of a volcano that isn't about to erupt anytime soon.

 

CopperCoyote

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But I still have my time machine.  So I simply travel forward in time 5,000 years to the point when the volcano erupts.  I wait around a few days for the lava to cool and then look around for the banana in the rocks left over.  Once I find it, I break the rocks open with a sledge hammer.  I then travel forward in time to the year 694,495 AD where I lock the banana in a bulletproof, military grade volt guarded by deadly missiles and lasers.  And it's all buried somewhere under miles of ice and snow in Antarctica.

 

South_Claw

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I use my third genie wish to get the banana back in my hands. I decided that the time machine needs to be destroyed, so I I steal some of your missiles and blow it up. 

I then give the banana to an immortal ape who has laser-vision and can fly. I also give him an army of giant spiders to use at his disposal.

 

CopperCoyote

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Jan 10, 2019
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I steal your genie lamp.  I use my first wish to take the banana from the immortal ape.  Then I use my second wish to kill the giant ape and his spider army.  I used my third and final wish to create a pocket dimension outside of space and time which only I have access to via my thought based teleportation powers.  I hide both the genie lamp and the banana in my new pocket dimension.

 
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Canine99

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Mar 27, 2019
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Uses dimension scissors to enter the dimension pocket to grap the banana. Then, wraps a 49 ton chain  around the banana and drops into a never ending puddle of mud

 
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CopperCoyote

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Jan 10, 2019
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I use a nearby crane to pull the banana back up by the chain wrapped around it.  After quickly washing of the banana off, I promptly throw it into a wood chipper and mushy banana bits splatter everywhere.