Kinmunity

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Time to tell your a therian

YourLocalWolfAndFox

Well-known member
They/Them
I'm sure he's fine.

I must confess 2 things tho: 1)I find blacklists on words to be a dumb concept. I mean if I can't say "lime" without getting banned I'm clearly in a nightmare of over offended nutjobs

2) while I respect them, I find trigger warnings stupid as there's been studies proving they don't help
My god, the blacklist on words like that suck! I agree with you on the second point too.
 

Jeb_CC

Moderation Team
Staff member
Guardian
+Primal Member
VIP
Alterhuman
Aromantic Pride
Asexual Pride
Xe/Xem
Friendly mod reminder to take personal conversations to private threads/dms. :)
 

Red-in-Tooth

Machairodont Felid
+Primal Member
VIP
Therianthrope
Golden Shield
He/Him
This is the advice I offer most, if not all, when in lapse of any situationally specific information.

For what reason does one need to tell anyone of being what is often called "therian" or similarly, "otherkin"?

I mean this in the most absolute sense, is it a need? Is it pressing? If so, why is it? What about it is pressing? What makes it worth the potential social consequences one is likely, if not liable, to face for doing so? What makes those being told trustworthy enough to have this kind of personal knowledge? What would it change for the better? Can any of that be assured to be the outcome? On and on this list can go, I am sure one understands by this point. If even one of these questions cannot be addressed well, then it should probably not be done at all until all of them, and those similar devised by oneself are too at that.

There is little to no benefit to be gained from making a purely internal experience and inner event an outer one to those who will likely not appreciate or understand it. Thus, there is no need or rush to pursue it; it may seem like a good idea to share this excitedly with everyone one cares about but never should it be forgotten that what is "other" is by default not the "norm". These persons, no matter how much they love oneself, are not liable to know what one is talking about or understand it even if they know it, and least of all, they almost assuredly cannot experience it and subsequently suffer from the reality of really only being able to conceive of it at most conceptually. Lastly, because they lack these three things, appreciating it is liable to be beyond them, even if it holds obvious value to oneself. To phrase this bluntly for the sake of one's potential relationships, this kind of seemingly sudden talk and its strangeness is very likely, if not quite likely, to permanently sabotage at worst and change at best, for better or worse, any relationship one has with the informed party. In the end, they might still be a good close friend or a loving parent or anything else and anything between, but if this is taken even remotely seriously, that dynamic will be irrevocably changed.

I will also add that the supermajority of those asking this very question are often quite new to their awakening and discovery process. This is not to say they are explicitly wrong about their discovery but as the trend goes, most are. In their excitement to share these new things of what they might be, all too often the deeper reflection and introspection on the matter has been scarcely done or at least done at depth and length which would lend self-credibility to what is, reasonably, an outlandish claim to the average person.

My personal advice is that unless one is both absolutely certain and absolutely has a reason for others to gain a need to know, this is best left never said aloud or hinted at too overtly. I have lived a lifetime's worth of encounters with people ranging from those who I am surrounded by and speak none of the language of to those I have known sincerely and intimately, and capable of speaking unspoken words with. There have been three in this entire time, who I have known for tens of years, who I so much as revealed it to and only after it was essential to continue our ways in doing so. In all three cases, it was a risk, and had it failed it would have cost me the few people I can safely say I have genuinely cared about; choose extremely wisely.

Ultimately it is one's choice in the end but never would it be my recommendation. There is too little to gain, too much to lose. Just live one's life impeccably toward oneself and others, allowing them to judge based off of actions carried out.
 

VioletDrake

Violet Gardens Patronus
+Primal Member
VIP
Golden Shield
Otherkin
Pansexual Pride
She/Her
I told my closest friends about my identity ... And on the internet. ^^" Aaand..
Of course.. to my lovers ... I wouldn't go to bed with them without it. Xd And I told my friend recently and all the reactions were nice. C:
But what I'm afraid of is my family.
They are conservative and I'm glad they barely understood that I had an ex-girlfriend as a female.
I think it will be a long time before I tell them. But I want to tell them. Because I love them. At least to my sister. She deserves to know. Maybe she'll be queer too. Her 11 years old. She has enough time. >¬<
As others have said .. You have to be sure of yourself .. To love yourself and then share it at the right time if you consider it important. :>

I would be ashamed that my child wouldn't want to tell me what they is and how they feels. I would be a terrible mother. Therefore, I will try to avoid it all. ^^
 

ShadowRain

Member
She/Her
2 cents from someone who spent their entire life figuring themself.

If this is on a spiritual level for you, why do you owe it to anyone to tell them your kinship?

Unlike what you can physically see (sexual orientation and gender expression) you cannot see what someone's spirit is.

In my own experience, I keep my kinship private, because it's no one's business if I find kinship with wolves. For all anyone knows I'm just the weird woman who occasionally tunes into an online sermon to strengthen my relationship with the good lord and tells people to drink more coffee while blasting (no pun intended) Rancid - ...And Out Come the Wolves.

I may tell my boo I have a wolf spirit. But he's agnostic and a critical thinker and would ask too many questions and I'm terrible at explaining what goes on within my own body. So for this reason, (to reference Deadpool) I'm the crazy that matches his crazy and anything that I may do is just me being me. Also our circle of people are skeptics of everything from the establishment to the LGBT community so I keep further to myself around them (bae knows my sexuality and is fully accepting).

From a 32 yr old wolf you don't owe therian coming out to anyone but you, yourself and your creator. Anyone whom you may tell should be people you have great trust that they won't demean you and make you feel like less of yourself. And even if you have those people, you don't owe it to them to explain yourself.

A lot of this 2 cent reply comes from life forcing me to disassociate from pack mentality and ride or die for very few people whom I know would also jump into a burning building to save me, as I would for them.

I'm here if you need someone, Verka.

~Shadow~
 
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