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What's Your Biggest Fear?

EvernightWild

Well-known member
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I actually put a lot of thought into this and even though I'm scared of those simple things (kidnappers, fire, spiders etc.), I think my biggest fear is a fear of failure. I'm a very big perfectionist and because my sister has gotten a bunch of awards and then somehow I've managed to get the same EVERY SINGLE YEAR, I put alot of pressure on myself to live up to that standard, which can result in serious mental/emotional breakdowns. Every single comment I get always seems to have some underline of negativity and a simple request from a teacher at school e.g. can you please not talk when I am talking, will stick in my head for ages and I will constantly beat myself up about it. Then I will beat myself up for beating myself up and yeah... it gets a little out of hand. So definitely failure for me.

What's your biggest fear?
 

Jeb_CC

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+Primal Member
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I actually put a lot of thought into this and even though I'm scared of those simple things (kidnappers, fire, spiders etc.), I think my biggest fear is a fear of failure. I'm a very big perfectionist and because my sister has gotten a bunch of awards and then somehow I've managed to get the same EVERY SINGLE YEAR, I put alot of pressure on myself to live up to that standard, which can result in serious mental/emotional breakdowns. Every single comment I get always seems to have some underline of negativity and a simple request from a teacher at school e.g. can you please not talk when I am talking, will stick in my head for ages and I will constantly beat myself up about it. Then I will beat myself up for beating myself up and yeah... it gets a little out of hand. So definitely failure for me.

What's your biggest fear?
I won't get too preachy but I do understand these fears. Important thing is to not compare yourself, remind yourself (unfortunately) that we are all still humans. Also, feeling bad about feeling bad - that's called meta emotions. Worth reading about if you want any help with it!

As for my own fears, the fear of the unknown is a big one. In obvious cases, this is fear of the darkest parts of the ocean, fear of the darkness. I'm not scared of the ocean or the darkness itself, I'm afraid of what unknown horrors might be lurking within it. And if I don't know what is there, I don't know how to prepare myself.
In day to day situations, this fear means I end up over planning my schedule. I do not do well with spontaneous jobs or requests. I need to know what I'm dealing with, to know that I can tackle it. Because if I can't tackle it, then I need to adjust something. But I don't know that unless I know... I'm trying to combat this fear by trying new things and trying to be more spontaneous. Eventually I'm sure the fear will subside on its own. It's not a big problem by any means, just one of my quirks.
 

Finna Alsvartr

Wolf-Mermaid-Demon Thing
Therianthrope
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I have a fear of being controlled. I have authority issues sometimes, especially when said authority figure is totalitarian. I'm scared of not having a voice, being rendered helpless by this fact. I like to do things my way and learn from what doesn't work, but when someone tells me to do something a way that doesn't make nearly as much sense (typically a parent or parental figure giving me busy work as a punishment), I question it. Then I get the, "just do it" from the person. I'm legitimately afraid of that.

This may have something to do with how I was raised. In my household, you don't get to question authority much. Even just asking why something is done the way it is can land you a slap on the cheek in some situations. I can't stand it.

Sorry, that got a bit vent-y.
 

EvernightWild

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As for my own fears, the fear of the unknown is a big one. In obvious cases, this is fear of the darkest parts of the ocean, fear of the darkness. I'm not scared of the ocean or the darkness itself, I'm afraid of what unknown horrors might be lurking within it. And if I don't know what is there, I don't know how to prepare myself.
In day to day situations, this fear means I end up over planning my schedule. I do not do well with spontaneous jobs or requests. I need to know what I'm dealing with, to know that I can tackle it. Because if I can't tackle it, then I need to adjust something. But I don't know that unless I know... I'm trying to combat this fear by trying new things and trying to be more spontaneous. Eventually I'm sure the fear will subside on its own. It's not a big problem by any means, just one of my quirks.
Yeah I totally get the fear of like the things that hide in the deep oceans or the dark, and I always used to just call it a fear of the ocean or the dark not a fear of the unknown so thanks for giving me a term for that. I also have a fear of the unknown when it comes to a dangerous activity (Ziplining? Not unless I know the exact mechanism that is stopping us from plummeting to our doom).

I also really don't like spontaneous changes or unexpected/not explained things popping up in my schedule, although I don't think it's because of the same reason. I get overwhelmed really easily, usually when things don't make sense, and what makes less sense than a random, unexplained thing?

needles? needles.
Yup, yup, yup, yup, yup. Needles. *shudders*

Literally, I had to get my mum to do my flu shot whilst I was sleeping because I cry and scream and shake uncontrollably every time I need to get a vaccine. Ugh, now my arm is aching just thinking about it.
 

Amber

Astral skydancer
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I don't usually think about this a lot. Needles? Nah, they're fine. Spiders? Yeah, they scare me a bit, but... not really. I have a certain degree of fear of incurable diseases that are hard to deal with, and also I dread losing control of myself. But probably the biggest fear is to get so sick that I'd have to rely on permanent help, be bedridden or otherwise couldn't live my own life anymore. In other words, total loss of freedom.

I absolutely don't want that, never ever. A big fat red "no" with blinking neon lights around it. I'm doing everything thinkable to avoid that situation, and if a medical treatment bears substantial risk of it happening, I won't take it even at the risk of dying. I will not allow this body be a prison to me.
 

EvernightWild

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I don't usually think about this a lot. Needles? Nah, they're fine. Spiders? Yeah, they scare me a bit, but... not really. I have a certain degree of fear of incurable diseases that are hard to deal with, and also I dread losing control of myself. But probably the biggest fear is to get so sick that I'd have to rely on permanent help, be bedridden or otherwise couldn't live my own life anymore. In other words, total loss of freedom.

I absolutely don't want that, never ever. A big fat red "no" with blinking neon lights around it. I'm doing everything thinkable to avoid that situation, and if a medical treatment bears substantial risk of it happening, I won't take it even at the risk of dying. I will not allow this body be a prison to me.
Wow. You sound really brave. Like your only fear is the fear that you won't be able to be brave, to be free. I admire it.
 

Kirby_and_Impish

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Genderflux Pride
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Therianthrope
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I’m afraid of being alone.
Not like I can’t stand being home alone or something but that I will never find my soulmate. I mean I am scared of being alone for too long but that’s not one of my big fears. I’m scared no one will love me the way I love them. It could be because the only people I have had crushed on rejected me… and I’m still a lovefool for them…
I’m also afraid those I love will leave me.
Im afraid of failing the people I love
 

AfterlifeCrew

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I’m afraid of being alone.
Not like I can’t stand being home alone or something but that I will never find my soulmate. I mean I am scared of being alone for too long but that’s not one of my big fears. I’m scared no one will love me the way I love them. It could be because the only people I have had crushed on rejected me… and I’m still a lovefool for them…
I’m also afraid those I love will leave me.
Im afraid of failing the people I love
we have this same fear. - Void, primary protector
 

CrowLove

Moderation Team
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As a human it is to just stand still, to not being able to do some progress in my life and to waste too much time.

In my other form, I fear to fail my missions and to bring others in danger caused by failing my missions.
 

EvernightWild

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I’m afraid of being alone.
Not like I can’t stand being home alone or something but that I will never find my soulmate. I mean I am scared of being alone for too long but that’s not one of my big fears. I’m scared no one will love me the way I love them. It could be because the only people I have had crushed on rejected me… and I’m still a lovefool for them…
I’m also afraid those I love will leave me.
Im afraid of failing the people I love
Being alone sucks. I get it, I really do. I might be young but I have seen so much through the eyes of others that I have lived through rejection and loneliness many times. One of my firm beliefs however is that everyone has a soulmate. Unfortunately, it might take years or decades or even multiple lives before you find them. But you will. And I have absolute faith in that and so should you.
 

Kirby_and_Impish

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Being alone sucks. I get it, I really do. I might be young but I have seen so much through the eyes of others that I have lived through rejection and loneliness many times. One of my firm beliefs however is that everyone has a soulmate. Unfortunately, it might take years or decades or even multiple lives before you find them. But you will. And I have absolute faith in that and so should you.
<333333 alright
 

2-D

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I have a few, but I'm working on it.

A big one is loss of control of my life. I am scared of not having a say in big life changing events, which has happened to me. I realize now that I do get a say in how I react, which could potentially change things tremendously. I grew up in an unstable and unpredictable home environment. I find security in predictability and certainty, but I am trying to make peace with the unpredictable nature of life.

These next two tie together: vulnerability with others, and rejection when I am in need of support and love (vulnerable). Especially if I cannot control the thing that I am scared of sharing. I cannot control or know how others will react to me, so seems easier in to not share. I want to be open with others, but I don't fully know how to be. As a result, I hide a lot of stuff behind an emotionally collected outer appearance.

I don't always fully open up, if I do open up. I cannot let myself cry in front of others, even when it is expected from the situation. I have to appear strong. It makes me feel safer, because I am scared of showing how I feel. I just walk away when something gets too overwhelming. I also want to be able to support others when they are upset, so I will often withhold my own feelings to comfort others.

I think I wasn't comforted when I needed it most as a child, so I learned how to hide my feelings and push them aside. This doesn't really help me or anyone else in the long run. I have started learning how to comfort myself. Self soothing is difficult with complex post traumatic stress, especially if you didn't learn how in the first place.

I feel lonely, because I cannot connect with others emotionally in the way that I need to in order to feel fulfilled. It is because I unconsciously shelter the more tender and needy parts of me. I am scared of making the wrong move and being too vulnerable. I want to be more physically intimate platonically, but I never know when to initiate contact. I am touch starved. I just want hugs and someone to hold my hand.

I am trying to open up more. This is one of those moments.
 

Dawndust

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I have a few, mainly Water the dark and well.. Huge things..

I can understand the water and Darkness things but WHY AM I AFRAID OF HUGE THINGS? It confuses me greatly as well I've never seen a big thing that could hurt me ((whalesharks, Sturgeons)) okay maybe moose but that's unlikely maybe I care way too much about stuff who knows
 

Jeb_CC

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I have a few, mainly Water the dark and well.. Huge things..

I can understand the water and Darkness things but WHY AM I AFRAID OF HUGE THINGS? It confuses me greatly as well I've never seen a big thing that could hurt me ((whalesharks, Sturgeons)) okay maybe moose but that's unlikely maybe I care way too much about stuff who knows
I can understand the fear of large things. Can't say exactly why it is that way for you but for myself there's a certain aura of impending danger when I'm close to something or even someone larger than myself. When they get close enough, tower over you, you start to realise how small and insignificant your body is in comparison.
 
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I have a few, but I'm working on it.

A big one is loss of control of my life. I am scared of not having a say in big life changing events, which has happened to me. I realize now that I do get a say in how I react, which could potentially change things tremendously. I grew up in an unstable and unpredictable home environment. I find security in predictability and certainty, but I am trying to make peace with the unpredictable nature of life.

These next two tie together: vulnerability with others, and rejection when I am in need of support and love (vulnerable). Especially if I cannot control the thing that I am scared of sharing. I cannot control or know how others will react to me, so seems easier in to not share. I want to be open with others, but I don't fully know how to be. As a result, I hide a lot of stuff behind an emotionally collected outer appearance.

I don't always fully open up, if I do open up. I cannot let myself cry in front of others, even when it is expected from the situation. I have to appear strong. It makes me feel safer, because I am scared of showing how I feel. I just walk away when something gets too overwhelming. I also want to be able to support others when they are upset, so I will often withhold my own feelings to comfort others.

I think I wasn't comforted when I needed it most as a child, so I learned how to hide my feelings and push them aside. This doesn't really help me or anyone else in the long run. I have started learning how to comfort myself. Self soothing is difficult with complex post traumatic stress, especially if you didn't learn how in the first place.

I feel lonely, because I cannot connect with others emotionally in the way that I need to in order to feel fulfilled. It is because I unconsciously shelter the more tender and needy parts of me. I am scared of making the wrong move and being too vulnerable. I want to be more physically intimate platonically, but I never know when to initiate contact. I am touch starved. I just want hugs and someone to hold my hand.

I am trying to open up more. This is one of those moments.
I can relate to all of that. I try not to let my past define who I am though and what I say and do. I used to be... that's why in my intro I say that one part of my personalities is purely evil. I once felt really lost and out of control of my life. There are still some things that I simply cannot control me now, but I have gotten better keeping cool in these situations. Though I am not afraid that I will be out of control (that's often how life works), I am terrified should I ever flip again. It is definitely the worst side of me and something I hate that I am capable of, since it can do so much hurt to all I love. My greatest fear is being alone. So long as you have support and love, you can get through many things. My next greatest fear is letting down those who depend on, look up to, or trust me. I can rest easy though, knowing that my fears depend on me.
 

Dawndust

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I can understand the fear of large things. Can't say exactly why it is that way for you but for myself there's a certain aura of impending danger when I'm close to something or even someone larger than myself. When they get close enough, tower over you, you start to realise how small and insignificant your body is in comparison.
Yeah that's kinda the feeling I get, tbh idk if this fear is common.
 

Kirsten015

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My main ones are having a fear of falling asleep and a fear of death.
The fear of death is something really complicated that I don't think I'll fully be able to explain. I just hate coldness and I extremely don't want to see a certain door from FMA again which just creeps me out.
I can't sleep unless my body just gets tired enough to because I probably have undiagnosed PTSD which some doctors I've been to have speculated and I always have to keep my eyes open or I will have majorly increased anxiety the instant I shut my eyes.
 
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I feel your pain, for the first. Falling asleep is a challenge because I feel that so much is going on and that I should be doing something. I usually have to read or something to escape my thoughts. When I do fall asleep, I get insane dreams or just straight-up nightmares much of the time. It doesn't generally happen when I get less sleep, so I stay up late and wake up early. I can't exactly sleep during the day, but some days I will take some spare time to lay in the sun and just rest in blissful forgetfulness to reset.

As for death, there is nothing I can say. It's gonna happen. I live my life and at the end I'll embrace death as an old friend. Don't run from him. He'll catch you. Don't search for him. He'll find you eventually, in his own time. Just give yourself up at the right moment.

What about death scares you? For me, it's simply disbelief that it could happen to me. Death seems so far off (yet sometimes he has come frighteningly close), I'm so young.
 

InkyDaily

Ink Hybrid
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Being abandoned. Replaces. Forgotten. At this point I can't let myself not think it'll happen again. It keeps happening. Again again again again. Everyone leaves.

And I feel so cold and empty. Even a late message, which I do know is ok and normal, sends, deep in my mind. Panic. I'm constantly in panic.

My mind tells me I've messed up. I'm not good enough. They'll move on they always move on.

And I deserve this.
Just for existing.
I shouldn't exist
I didn't come out right
They'll all leave
 
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