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All About Me

Since I talked about my system in my last post, its time to tell you about me. There may be some complaining.

I am Addy and I am 39 years old. I will be 40 this July and it depresses me. Nate is 10 years younger than me and will be 30 this August. I identify solely as a heterosexual female.

I live with my mom and younger brother in a run down trailer. Half the lights don't work, now all but one outlet in the living room has gone out. Our landlord won't do anything about it. When I try to get electrical advice online people only tell me to move.

We're working on that but we can't afford it right now. We're living on my mom and my brothers SSI and I can't work. I've been trying to get SSI for 5 years. I got another lawyer that I hope is better than my last lawyer. We will be applying for housing next week.

My depression started when I was 14 or 15 but I was not diagnosed until I was 34 or 35. My bi polar disorder likely started in 2014 but I was not diagnosed until 2018. My PTSD started in 2018 when my bf, Aiden, passed away in an ATV accident. It took some time but I finally stopped grieving and found someone else.

Now I have an amazing bf named Aaron who is everything I've ever wanted or needed. I seriously can't believe how good he is for me. We've been together 10 months now and I got to visit him for two weeks in Jan. As soon as I, him, and his brother have both does of the vaccine, we're planning another visit. Hes trying to save up money for us to get an apartment together.

I used to have a cat named Azreal who ran away in 2019 and I have no idea what happened to her. She was staying around the trailer for a while then she just vanished. I read that indoor female cats stay within a 2 block radius of home but I've asked everyone in a 2 block radius and no one has seen her. I was never able to get missing pet posters printed.

I used to be a chain smoker for around 15 years and tried unsuccessfully to quit twice. First I tried cold turkey but stress made me start again. Then I tried patches and gum and couldn't deal with it so I started again. I finally quit in late 2015 when I started vaping. Now I chain vape but its better than cigarettes. My smokers cough is gone, I breathe better, I don't run out of breath when I walk long distances.

I have no plans to quit vaping cause I know I will go right back to cigarettes. My sress is too great. I deal with living in this shit hole and listening to my mom and brother screaming at each other. I also love my new ecig and my vape flavors.

I think thats all I can say about myself. I will say that I vape less with my bf but still vape. So I may cut back when I move in with him, but we will see. I vape the most when I'm at my laptop and I didn't spend a lot of time on my laptop with my bf.


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