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Face Disphoria

Had quite the headache today, and while I was recovering a bit in a dark room, ended up noticing something I had talked about before but could never quite place : why the flat face of a human bothered me so much.

In the dark, without a mirror, and honestly kinda tired and confused because of the headache, running my hands on my face felt really strange. I was curled up, hands on my forehead, and this position felt completely natural, but as soon as I touched my nose going down it felt like my face was weirdly deformed, like something was sprouting from where it shouldn't. After thinking a bit, I think it's because I assume I am still touching the top of my head, and like with a beak or snout, this should be smooth, and the nose is the point where the human face actually physically reminds itself to me. The joint of the neck felt strange as well, like it wasn't connecting right. Overall, a very weird experience.

(old blog)

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Hemlock
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